More About Blossom and Who's A Racist

Those of you who know me (IRL or otherwise) will not be surprised by this, but two of my very few interests are BLOSSOM and WHO IS A RACIST.

I am still kinda shocked at how much thought I give to Blossom.  I only ever remember watching a few episodes, and most of those details escape me.

I had a memory of Blossom's dad and mom (or dad's sweetheart?) singing AIN'T NO MOUNTAIN HIGH ENOUGH at maybe Blossom's older brother's wedding?  White people singing this song to a couple (white and African American) and the woman's (African American) family.

I couldn't find the clip, and while this link is eye-opening (5 seasons!  what plotlines!  who knew?), it did not help me.

Where am I going here?  Come on, People of the Internet.  Say it with me:

IS THIS RACIST?

Oh my goodness.  There are so many answers.  As always I retreat to or take refuge in the Four Corner Logic , and say:

YES
NO
BOTH
NEITHER

I so badly want to use this GIF:

But, you know, whether it is racist is probably not the issue at hand.  Satisfying as it is to call someone out for being a racist or a Nazi or whatev, the real issue here is THE PERMANENCE OF BLOSSOM IN MY INNER LIFE.

I mean, really.  WTF?

I Signify*

Pardon me while I rehash some ongoing thoughts about Blossom and Urkel.
 
Both were quirky teenagers featured on 80s TV shows.  Mayim Bialik is now a PhD, mother (just wrote a book on parenting), actor (Big Bang theory), and appears to be a Modern Orthodox Jew (problematically sidestepped on What Not To Wear**, I think).

Jaleel White continues to act, write, and produce.  He won a bunch of NAACP Image Awards, although there was some recent controversy regarding partner violence.

Would it be fair to say that these kids played squeaky-clean dorks who made their road by walking?  Sure.  Might there have been overlap with their real life selves?  Not sure that's relevant.

My poorly-articulated issue here is actually my increasing identification with Urkel.  While we are both Chicagoans and have very snappy fashion sense (meeting around the giant glasses, highwaters, and suspenders, which all RULE), I am not totally sure what is going on here.  You don't have to psychoanalyze me (although you are welcome to do so in comments), but it's troubling that I seem to be unable to think about Blossom, Mayim, Urkel, or Jaleel separately.  Why do I place them in a (false) binary?

In one corner, we have a pre-Riot Grrl quirky dork girl with bananas musical talent and integrity (fact and fiction).  I am not surprised that a lot of my pals (especially but not exclusively white female-assigned people in their 30s and 40s) identify really strongly with ol' B.

In the other corner, we have a black nerd, a phrase now gaining media traction in, you know, indie rock, TV, and comedy.

Herein the problem begins to show.

 Intersectional identities matter here.  The question remains whether we are documenting, reproducing, transforming, or doing something else with stereotypes and social expectations.

Do I have to unpack that thought?  Maybe I'll come back later.

A big plus, for me, in my recent learning about Urkel is that he had a catchphrase about cheese:

GOT ANY CHEESE?

I think about that a lot.

Because I want cheese, like, all the time.

Which is also problematic.  Ask our mother, the cow.

What do you think?  Lay it out in comments, please.









*Yep, a reference to a killer God Is My Co-Pilot song.  Sure, it doesn't necessarily fit with the 80s sit-com teen dork theme, but arguments can be made for intertextual relevance and stuff.
 **Mayim was on a recent-ish "What Not To Wear," the TV show that is kind of inspirational and appealing (I WANT A THOUSAND BUCKS TO GO BUY NEW CLOTHES!) but also shaming and promotes the cult of monoculture (EVERYONE IN BOOT CUT JEANS, YALL).

To quote Le Tigre:

MISOGYNIST?  GENIUS?

Although almost nothing surprises me about life under patriarchy, I am still stunned by this commercial.

RECAP!  Three white dudes in neckties* goof off at their white-collar jobs, playing on their smartphones.  They do a variety of phallic gestures, including popping the champagne cork and playing electric guitar.  One guy adopts a "classic hillbilly TM" accent to ask if "a gentleman with a bro-stache" is invited to this party. **

While they are doing their raced, classed, and gendered performances at their desks***, and loudly, the camera cuts to a woman of color looking on in shock.

So:  GENIUS?  MISOGYNIST?  I mean, this commercial is telling it like it is: woman and people of color do the work while upper-middle class white dudes rub their privilege in everyone's face AND make more money than anyone else in the office.  But is it parody or painful truth?

I have to go vom**** now.  BRB.



*necktie?  phallus.

**"classic hillbilly accent TM"? casual class-privileged reinforcement of economic inequality and race- and class-based stereotypes.

***it is not that their performances are raced, classed, and gendered that is the problem, of course.  It's the way in which benefits or penalties inhere around particular aspects of identity that is the problem, and the way that some people never have to think about it, and can see their lives as solely an individual accomplishment.

****vom?  VOMIT.